Our leaders call the coronavirus a health crisis. I agree. It’s a MENTAL health crisis.
I am completely mystified at all the furor over corona. As far as I can tell it is virtually no different than any other corona cold or flu virus that we contend with normally, with the exception that it is a bit more efficient at killing the elderly and health compromised, wholly inefficient at killing the young and healthy, and supposedly much more contagious. With that knowledge, why don’t we quarantine the elderly and health-compromised and allow the virus to run its course through the rest of us so we can live our lives and not destroy our economy? We seemed to handle the swine flu pandemic handily enough with extra demand on 300,000 more hospital beds, and there was none of this panic.
Remember, these are the same people who brought you the West Nile virus, the bird flu, and any number of hyped outbreaks that just didn't take. Finally, they have one to savor.
Instead of throwing the whole state into panic, harpooning our economy, and creating an atmosphere uncomfortably close to a police state, our governor could say something like this: “Citizens, the current coronavirus has our elderly and health-compromised in its crosshairs. I am therefore recommending (not ordering) a quarantine for this specific group of people. They will not receive many visitors during this outbreak, and the visitors they do receive and any workers in the health field must wear masks, because as we know, while masks are ineffective in preventing reception of the virus, they're excellent in preventing transmission. As for the rest of you younger uncompromised people, this virus is little more than an annoyance just like any other cold or flu. Live your lives, wash your hands, keep a little more distance from each other, stay home if you’re sick, and don’t let the bed bugs bite. That is all. God bless America.”
Why the heck can’t we do THAT? Sheesh, is fear and paranoia really so much better?
Anyway, I decided to exert my creative powers to bring a little humor in the midst of all this tumult. Enjoy.
Coronaville
(to the tune of Jimmy Buffett’s “Margaritaville”)
Watchin' the news take,
Seein' my friends quake,
As they adjust their fedoras of foil.
It is a real fling,
A totally new thing.
Smell the pants they’re beginnin' to soil.
Wastin' away again down in Coronaville.
Waitin' for the insanity halt.
Some people claim that there's a virus to blame,
But I know it's nobody's fault.
Goodbye to reason,
It’s panic season,
Closin’ the town is the best thing to do.
Though it's a bit fruity,
It’s all of our duty.
How we got here I haven't a clue.
Wastin' away again down in Coronaville.
Waitin' for the insanity halt.
Some people claim that there's a virus to blame,
But I think it’s sure somebody’s fault.
Can’t go to the IHOP.
Fear is the top cop.
They’ve put a padlock on my own home
So this lethal life-ender
Will return to sender,
But it won’t listen, it’s going to roam.
Wastin' away again down in Coronaville.
Waitin' for the insanity halt.
Some people claim that there's a virus to blame,
But I know it's our own damn fault.
Yes, some people claim that there's a virus to blame,
But I know it's our own damn fault.