FROM DONNY
I have begun the process of writing an epic poem with the hope of someday finding someone willing to publish. Please critique this sample so I can tell If I am going in the right direction.
Who has heard of Fyodor,
The hero of Mod who reclaimed the honor
That his family had long been lacking?
All know of Denahar the Exile
Who founded the great city of Kisuvo
And peopled it with a grat throng of men, refugees
Of the once-powerful realm of Rendurthane, and
Who won for himself a mighty kingdom. His
Kingdom stretched out for leagues upon leagues from
The Cestir Mountains in the west,
The Batura in the south, and
The Great Sea the southeast with its treacherous
Waves and tales of creatures keeping
Men away from its shores and its deadly foam.
For many winters Denahar ruled, and
He left for his son a beautiful gold ring from
Ancient antiquity that was supposed
To be the heirloom of Kisuvo.
Many generations of lords came from his line…
RESPONSE
By what standard do you call this a poem? It has no rhyme, no discernible meter, no poetic language...nothing any reasonably educated person would judge as poetry. It's just bad prose broken into lines to look like a poem.
Read up on the poetic structure of the Iliad or Shakespeare or any other lengthy poetic work. You might think twice about writing an epic poem, because lemme tellya, it ain't easy, brother.