I had a little debate with a fellow who called himself Liberal, and he ended his comments with the questions below. I decided to have a little fun in answering his questions.

COMMENT FROM LIBERAL

You say that liberalism is implausible. Is it implausible that global warming will have catastrophic effects if not immediately addressed? Is it implausible that less corporate regulation will cause the concentration of wealth to increase to the point of a virtual monarchy here in the US? 

RESPONSE

Is it implausible that global warming will have catastrophic effects if not immediately addressed?

I guess you missed where they call it "climate change" now, because the earth has actually been cooling for the past dozen or so years. Why limit ourselves to warming where we have to doctor the data, when we could use every burp and fart from mother nature as a reason to tax and regulate businesses out of existence? So let's at least use the right term and ask the correct question: Is it implausible that climate change will have catastrophic effects if not immediately addressed?

That's an interesting question. Since it's a given that scientists have not the slightest clue about the earth's climate and cannot even predict let alone control the climate or weather in any given location on earth let alone the entire earth, I would say that yes, that's about as implausible as it gets. It requires an almost pathological arrogance to think we can control the earth's climate. We just experienced some pretty hefty storms in my area, and guess what? Not a single weatherman or scientist knew they were coming. Totally unexpected, no warning, the tornado sirens didn't even sound. Amazing how we have no clue what's happening just in our little location, and even if we did, we could do absolutely nothing to prevent it, yet we think we know exactly what's happening with the climate of the entire earth and can control it. The idea is preposterous.

But okay, let's at least TRY to take the question seriously. So climate change is a bad thing. Despite several millennia of the climate changing to no real detriment, at last we've discovered it's an evil that needs eradicated. We need climate uniformity. By golly, THAT will secure the happiness and future of ourselves and our posterity. But how can we SHOW that is the case? How can we DEMONSTRATE that climate uniformity is the key to the future? The earth is too vast and complex; people can't see and understand the huge benefits to be reaped by climate uniformity.

I have the answer! We find a location where the climate is uniform, and we make THAT our showpiece for our cause! Brilliant! People could visit the location where the climate never changes and see for themselves how good things could really be if we spread that happiness to the entire earth. Oh, it's a master stroke! All we need is a location and WE ARE GOLD! But where?

Well, the moon would be great if people could visit it. You wanna talk climate uniformity, there's your poster child...NEVER changes...but that whole no oxygen thing kinda puts a damper on the cause.

Where to go...where to go...Ah! The Sahara Desert! The climate never changes THERE! But then...hmmm...no water or food of any kind and killing heat. That might make people cranky.

What we need is a location that gives people positive vibes, a real...I got it! The North Pole! The climate never changes, plenty of water, albeit frozen, and it's got the whole Christmas/Santa mystique going for it. But...food is pretty sparse, and it IS a tad chilly, and it's not exactly a snap to get there. Also, no casinos.

You know, maybe I’m approaching this whole thing wrong. We don’t want to overwhelm people with the benefits of climate uniformity, it could be too intimidating. Maybe what we want is a smaller place, a city where the climate normally changes, but recently got a good dose of climate uniformity - you know, sort of a before and after scenario. Now THAT ought to cinch the case! We’d have passels of people hopping aboard the climate uniformity express with a place like that. But where?

Got it! New Orleans! Perfect! There they were wallowing in the misery of climate change when suddenly, climate uniformity by the name of Katrina introduced herself. Non-stop wind and rain for hours and hours, about as uniform as you could hope to find. It lifted them, that climate uniformity. It lifted them to heights they never expected. It lifted them right into the ocean.

Or maybe Cordova, Alaska. I don’t think they knew just how unfulfilled and sad they were until climate uniformity showed them the light of a new and better day. Weeks of climate uniformity blessing fell upon them, unremitting, unchanging until they had 18 feet of it. In fact, they were so blessed, they called in the National Guard to share it with them.

Well, I’ll let liberals decide which is the best example of climate uniformity. I’m not much for public relations. But now, let's further suspend our sense of the ridiculous and pretend we can actually do something to control the earth's climate. Let’s pretend God thought us competent and knowledgeable enough to leave the earth’s climate in our hands. We’ve discovered climate change is evil and that greenhouse gases are throttling the life from our planet, and by golly, we’re not going to take it any more!

We launch a study to find the main culprit, the primary catalyst for the greenhouse effect, because when we find it, we will annihilate it and thus secure our future. We find the culprit, THE arch enemy to our health and happiness. All other enemies are pygmies compared to this one giant, this vile, despicable, life-threatening polluting poison that pervades the planet and accelerates the deadly greenhouse effect. What evil, soulless corporation spewed this toxic anathema into our environment? No tax is big enough for it, no regulation could strangle it enough to suit us. We will have justice! Justice, I say! Attica! Attica!

What is this poison you might ask? What is this deadly menace, this surreptitious pestilence, THE PRIMARY architect of all our greenhouse sorrows and woes? Tell us, so we can attack it at once and eliminate it from the face of the earth. Tell us now!

Alrighty then…it’s water. Eliminate away.

Is it implausible that less corporate regulation will cause the concentration of wealth to increase to the point of a virtual monarchy here in the US? 

So, concentration of wealth bad, even distribution of wealth good. Let’s say I agree with that proposition. Would you agree that in order to combat this great evil of wealth concentration we should attack the spot with the greatest wealth concentration first and then work our way down the ladder? We find the biggest offender of wealth concentration and start slicing and dicing, right? What is the entity with the greatest concentration of wealth in the U.S.? Quick, let’s find out so we can destroy it, confiscate those assets, and start passing out the goodies. Just tell us who it is.

It’s the U.S. government.

Still game? Or has the idea become implausible all of the sudden?